T.O.F.P.A.
Having finally found the courage to announce that I would not
be doing another zine, I promptly got my arm twisted into...
doing another zine. The first submissions arrived within days,
and they were so good I could hardly back out. For a long while I
provisionally called the zine Eric, not for want of a better
name, but because I wasn't sure I could pull off my rather
ambitious plans for a cover. These plans were first hatched in
1997, with B7's 20th anniversary looming. Had this idea of
launching the latest issue of AltaZine in January 1998 with the
catchy subtitle It was twenty years ago today... Does
this remind you of a certain song? It did me. Unfortunately I
didn't have a PC then, so my graphics potential wasn't up to
much. Never mind, better late than never.
So here is the cover, complete with its panoply of characters
real and fictional, and I leave it to you to decide what most of
them have to do with Blakes 7.
Staring at the back and moving downish in a vaguely
left-to-right direction, we have:
- Tinky-Winky, Dipsy, La-La and Po (Teletubbies)
- John, Paul, George and Ringo (badly spelled insects)
- Terry Nation (writer)
- Wing Commander Douglas Bader (RAF)
- Mr Yasser Arafat (martyr/pariah/revolutionary hero -
delete as appropriate)
- John Steed (Avenger)
- Neil Faulkner (no one in particular)
- Ronald Reagan (statesman)
- Margaret Thatcher (stateswoman)
- Arlen (Federation officer)
- Captain Pugwash (pirate)
- Greg (Survivor)
- Servalan (Supreme Commander)
- Astrid Proll (RAF)
- Superman (ideological icon)
- Bert (who is evil)
- Darth Vader (redeemed villain)
- the Third Doctor (Time Lord)
- Ann Frank (diarist)
- Soolin (two-dimensional stereotype)
- Vila Restal (three-dimensional stereotype)
- John Ritchie (musician)
- Del Tarrant (deserter)
- Judge Dredd (authoritarian)
- Captain Jean-Luc Picard (Democrat space captain)
- Alien robot from Cadburys Smash TV commercial (source of
nostalgia)
- Captain James T Kirk (Republican space captain)
- Dayna Mellanby (token ethnic minority representative)
- Ming the Merciless (autocrat)
- ABBA (cultural entrepreneurs)
- J K Rowling (reactionary)
- a dalek (adapted native of Skaro)
- Judith Proctor (B7 fandom writer/editor/publisher)
- Cally (telepath)
- Kerr Avon (technician)
- Anna Grant (revolutionary leader killed by Avon)
- Roj Blake (revolutionary leader killed by Avon)
- Valentina Tereshkova (cosmonaut)
- Jenna Stannis (free trader)
- Jenna Jameson (porn kitten)
- Peter Sutcliffe (lorry driver)
- Geri Haliwell (former Spice Girl)
- Federation trooper (state security operative)
- Programmed Guardian (conveniently implacable enemy)
- Emperor Penguin (Aptenodytes forsteri)
- Diana, Princess of Wales (road death statistic)
- Father Clanger (alien)
- Buzz Aldrin (astronaut)
Altogether, there are 57 different characters on the cover,
which is a composite of 50 elements (including Sgt Pepper's band
on which the faces of Blake etc were superimposed, and the drum
logo).