Sherry's Scooter Funnies One does not OWN an Italian motorcycle, one mearly has the priveledge of paying for its upkeep. The Joke: A man walks into a biker bar with a T-shirt that says "BIKERS IS STOOPID!" and orders a beer. The bartender says "hey you'd better get out of here! This is a biker bar and they're going to be here soon!" The man looks at his and says "awe I wouldn't worry, they're too stupid to read!" Just then a couple of bike's come in and as they walk by they notice the T-shirt. The one biker stops and says "hey pal, whats that on you t-shirt?? The man looks at the bartender and says "see I told you they were too stupid to read!" Well the biker then replies, "o.k. pal let take it out side!" So they go out and pretty soon the man walks back in and says to the bartender, "see I told you those bikers were stupid... they brought knives to a gun fight!" A truck driver was eating breakfast at a lunch counter, when a gang of motorcycle tough- guys walked in. One of the bikers put his finger in the truck driver's coffee and said, "Not very hot, is it?" Then another biker put his finger in the scrambled eggs and said, "Not very fluffy, are they?" Finally, without saying a word, the trucker paid for his meal and left. "Wasn't much of a man, was he?", the gang leader asked the waitress. "He's no great driver either", replied the waitress. "He just ran over a bunch of motorcycles." Harley rider is broken down by the side of the road (as usual). A BMW rider stops to help. "You need any help?" "Yeah, have you got a wrench?" "Sure, what size?" "A big one. I want to use it for a hammer." A pregnant motorcylists goes to see her doctor. "What position should I take to give birth?" "The same position you were in when you concieved the baby." "What, one leg over the handlebars and one foot on the ground?" What about the guy that designed a turbo-super-duper charger to his bike that would increase the speed 10 fold in 1.5 secs? There he was cruising down the highway only 50% above the speed limit and this cop on another bike starts waving him down. He can't afford to get caught so he kicks in the super-duper turbo and vanishes 90 miles down the highway. He turns round and cruises back again and about where he took off from there are ambulances and flashing lights and all. So he goes over and there is the cop lying on a stretcher all gravel rashed and torn. "Whew!" says the guy. "What happened?" The ambulance man said, "Seems he was chasing this other guy on a bike and suddenly his bike stopped dead and he got off it to see what had happened and that's all he can remember." This badass biker decides to take a ride north, up through Canada around the coast to Alaska. Being a typical bro', he's wearing a pisspot and black wraparounds, despite it being 20 below freezing and dark 18 hours of the day. As he pulls into Dildo, Canada (pop 223 ... it really does exist), he notices to his amazement that his trusty sled is leaking oil. He swiftly searches out the town mechanic who comes out and looks his Harley over. Straightening himself up again, the mechanic looks at the biker and says "Well man, it looks like you just blew a seal". The bro, a little taken aback, blushes and says "No way, it's just frost on my beard." "I nearly ran over a pedestrian a few minutes ago and I think he was from Miami." "How do you know he was from Miami?" "Well, when he reached the sidewalk, I heard him say something about the sun and the beach." Biker gets a scholarship to Harvard. At orientation he asks an upperclassman "Can you tell me where the administration building is at?" Upperclassman sniffs "At Harvard, one never ends a sentence with a preposition." So the biker says "Can you tell me where the administration building is at, asshole." The guy walks into the moto store and says "I'd like to get new mirrors for my Harley." The salesman thinks a second, then replies "Well, I think it's a fair trade" In August at the annual Cortland, N.Y., 200-rider demonstration against the state's mandatory motorcycle helmet law, five protestors were thrown from their bikes, lacerated, and suffered head injuries when a tire blew out on one cycle. All five were cited for failure to wear helmets.
From the Internet. © Unknown. Attribution: [1] terryb@bigfoot.com [2] Bill (Willy T) Telle [3] Dave Browne