[Compiler's Note: vi & emacs are the two principal competing text
editors on unix systems. They each have their fierce proponents
(witness the newsgroup name!). They are both quite arcane.]
From: mmccall@emoryu1.cc.emory.edu (P r i n c e s s of the U n i v e r s e)
O Bretheren and Sisteren, I am cursed with a problem that the
DeVIl's editor and Pico (as opposed to elite) seem unable to solve.
I confess full and absolute ignorance. Have mercy, for I have an
Art degree and an English degree and there was no such things as a
Computer Science Major when I was in college. )grovel profusely(
I use both a PC and a Mac that thinks it is a PC. Here is my quest,
which has led me to lamentations, robe-tearing and wailing and
gnashing of teeth: I wish to take a collection of .signature files
(all under 4 lines) that I have placed in a directory called TA0
and rotate them with every article I post via .tin to USENET
newsgroups. I don't care if it is in order, or randomly, or by a
time factor. I just wish to show a little variety with less effort.
(I usually forgo a .sig altogether rather than wrestle with the
VIper.)
I smeared ashes upon my head and crawled the longest mile through
the seven levels of experts at my helpdesk. They were all willing
to help, but warned me of the dreaded Tremendous Learning Curve and
of the One True Editor Itself. )snurfle, grovel(
I have been smited with tomes of great Obfuscation and Technolingo
and lo, I am bleeding and forelorn. I wish only to dink with my
.sig files. Can I be saved? I have seen the glory of The One True
Editor and I am dazzled and blinded by its Magnificence but I am
entirely too st00pid to figure it out. I wish to avoid damaging
anything. )beg(
Could this humble supplicant receive enlightenment from a prophet
or priest(ess) of the Most High and Holy Temple of EMACS? In, like,
English? My gratitude would be limitless; yea, it would know no
bounds. I would gratefully dedicate an entire .sig to the Church of
EMACS. My fate is in your hands.
Most inferiorly yours,
La Lurka
(Malinda McCall, librarian)
mmccall@emory.edu
=======================
From: erikr@panix.com (coyote)
In article (ERICDING.94Jun21154443@stone.san-jose.ate.slb.com),
Eric Ding (ericding@San-Jose.ate.slb.com) wrote:
)Um, could you please cut the useless drivel as a start,
)and just ask the questions that need to be answered? Thanks.
1) Why do elephants have long noses?
2) What is a 'fleash?'
=======================
From: ejh@larry.gsfc.nasa.gov (Edward Hartnett)
))))) "Eric" == Eric Ding (ericding@San-Jose.ate.slb.com) writes:
Eric) Um, could you please cut the useless drivel as a start, and just ask the
Eric) questions that need to be answered? Thanks.
Oh impatient one! Have you no respect for those seeking knowledge of
the One True Editor!
For shame! As a meditation I suggest you do M-x praise-emacs 100
times.
(Of course with the power of the Editor one can do this in an instant
with C-u 100 M-x praise-emacs!)
=======================
From: ejh@larry.gsfc.nasa.gov (Edward Hartnett)
))))) "P" == P r i n c e s s of the U n i v e r s e (mmccall@emoryu1.cc.emory.edu) writes:
P) O Bretheren and Sisteren, I am cursed with a problem that the
P) DeVIl's editor and Pico (as opposed to elite) seem unable to solve.
P) I confess full and absolute ignorance. Have mercy, for I have an
P) Art degree and an English degree and there was no such things as a
P) Computer Science Major when I was in college. )grovel profusely(
P) I use both a PC and a Mac that thinks it is a PC. Here is my quest,
P) which has led me to lamentations, robe-tearing and wailing and
P) gnashing of teeth: I wish to take a collection of .signature files
P) (all under 4 lines) that I have placed in a directory called TA0
P) and rotate them with every article I post via .tin to USENET
P) newsgroups. I don't care if it is in order, or randomly, or by a
P) time factor. I just wish to show a little variety with less effort.
P) (I usually forgo a .sig altogether rather than wrestle with the
P) VIper.)
Oh tormented soul, lost in the land of the EviL one, you must follow
the straight and narrow path of the One True Editor.
P) I smeared ashes upon my head and crawled the longest mile through
P) the seven levels of experts at my helpdesk. They were all willing
P) to help, but warned me of the dreaded Tremendous Learning Curve and
P) of the One True Editor Itself. )snurfle, grovel(
Do not heed those whose faith is weak, for did not the Great One teach
us that when one learns the user interface of the One True Editor, one
learns the interface to all things?
P) I have been smited with tomes of great Obfuscation and Technolingo
P) and lo, I am bleeding and forelorn. I wish only to dink with my
P) .sig files. Can I be saved? I have seen the glory of The One True
P) Editor and I am dazzled and blinded by its Magnificence but I am
P) entirely too st00pid to figure it out. I wish to avoid damaging
P) annything. )beg(
Remember brother, if you damage anything it is the will of the One
True Editor. Do not fear this.
P) Could this humble supplicant receive enlightenment from a prophet
P) or priest(ess) of the Most High and Holy Temple of EMACS? In, like,
P) English? My gratitude would be limitless; yea, it would know no
P) bounds. I would gratefully dedicate an entire .sig to the Church of
P) EMACS. My fate is in your hands.
Have you tried the holy tutorial? Here is the first mystery of the One
True Editor: the tutorial does not teach you how to use Emacs!
This is indeed subtle and powerful, for the tutorial teaches you how
to use the might info-mode, and the sacred info pages contain all
information about the One True Editor, yea, verily, the entire manual
set is available on-line with hypertext and search capability!
Therefore go thou and try C-h t.
P) Most inferiorly yours,
P) La Lurka
We are all but novices in the face of the mighty Editor.
=========================
From: mmccall@emoryu1.cc.emory.edu (P r i n c e s s of the U n i v e r s e)
Oh Bretheren and Sisteren,
I am still wading through the miasmic forest of Ignorance that
comprises my entire existence lately. The Most Holy Help Text seems
to avoid me. Could it be that my machine is possessed by the Evil
and Treacherous VI? I fear it is so. :( Pico, the weak and
friendly, has been a comfort in these trying times but is unable to
say "boo" sufficiently loud enough to startle yon average goose.
I will prevail, with your guidance. I shall overcome! But, for now,
I am meeting with the Tremendous Learning Curve and am unable to
smite same with my Great Foo-Foo Sword of Much Ouch-making and
Power (i.e., studious application to confusing things). I will keep
thee posted (allxecp
CURSE THEE, VI, THOU ART A MOST INFERNAL AND EXASPERATING EDITOR
AND I DESPISE THEE!!!!! )ahem(
thee posted (all except
ye of little humor, who have no doubt
lost patience at this my grovel and who have no doubt used the
mighty Killfile already).
I bid thee all adieu, and I will keep ye all posted on my progress.
Observe below, I now have two quaint -- symbols where none were
before. This is progress of a sort. :)
La Lurka
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