A woman's idea of the perfect man is someone who is obedient, well-mannered, faithful, can empty the garbage, and is a great lover in bed. Now if only you could train a dog to have sex in positions other than doggie style and bestiality was more socially accepted ...
He: Since I first laid eyes on you, I've wanted to make love to you in the worst way. She: Well, you succeeded.
They say that men only think about sex. That's not exactly true. They also care a lot about power, world domination, money, and beer.
A man leaned toward an attractive woman at a bar and told her, "Haven't I seen you somewhere before?" "Yes," she replied in a loud voice, "I'm the receptionist at the V.D. clinic."
It would be wonderful if there was a potion that could give the average guy the physique of Sylvester Stallone, the brains of Ted Koppel, and the sense of humor of John Goodman. Of course, it could be a little scary. One mix-up and you end up with a guy with John Goodman's body, Sylvester Stallone's I.Q., and the charm of Ted Koppel.
Single women claim that all the good men are married, while all married women complain about their lousy husbands. This confirms that there is no such thing as a good man.
At Jenners, women get excited, thrilled, and overjoyed by purchasing the perfect item. Men experience the same feelings just by finding a close parking space.
If a man was king of the world, he would make every Sunday a Super Bowl Sunday, outlaw cleaning, and require women to work naked.
A single man in his 40's often has a problem finding women at his level of maturity. That's why he dates someone half his age.
So many bachelors lie about their jobs, drive cars they can't afford, wear toupees and loose shirts that hide their stomachs ... and say they want a "real women"!
From the Internet. Original © not known. This version ©2000 OFC