What to do with an old modem

  1. Put it under a door and you have a Door Stop
  2. Attach a stick and you have a Snow Plow
  3. Put it on a shelf and you have a Book End
  4. Put it on top of some papers and you have a Paper Weight
  5. Put some powder in it and it is a Bomb Shell
  6. Throw it and it is a Baseball
  7. Put a Satellite Dish on it and you have Great TV reception
  8. Put some coils in it and you have a great portable heater
  9. Cut some holes and tell your friends you bought it in Holland
  10. Attach balloons and it becomes 1 of those things they use to hold Balloons
  11. Sell it to someone as a universal adapter
  12. Put a light bulb in it and you have a Decorative Walkway Light
  13. Use it as a coaster for your favorite drink
  14. Give it to your Uncle, he'll find something to do with it
  15. Hook it on your TV and it is a TV adapter for your Television
  16. Sell it as a Black Box.
  17. Save water by putting it in the toilet tank!
  18. Use it as an anvil
  19. Isn't that the age at which you can LEGALLY drink?
  20. It could be one of those useless props at a school play
  21. Get a hammer and vent your stress out on it
  22. Make a few adjustments and turn it into a radio
  23. Use the parts to make a board game
  24. Make a Nintendo game out of it
  25. Put in a processor and sell it as the world's chunkiest computer
  26. Take it out when the guests come over and it is a decoration
  27. Put it on the Christmas tree and it is an Ornament!
  28. Use it as a Saxophone Damper
  29. Make it into a parallel port DAC
  30. Use it to make a model car
  31. Trade it in for a new life
  32. Use it as a footrest
  33. Take it to sports games and have it signed like a baseball
  34. Pad it, cut it, and you have a new pair of knee-pads
  35. Isn't that MTV?
  36. Use it as a snow sampler
  37. Attach it to the Principal's Laptop Computer and say it is a tumor
  38. Cut some holes in it and use it as a Disk Store
  39. Sell the parts to a techie nerd and make a lot of money
  40. Use it to stop your car in an emergency
  41. Drop it off a boat with a string and it is an anchor
  42. Use it to scan for fish in a lake
  43. Make your phone into a speaker phone
  44. Take it to your next party and it will be the talk of the town
  45. Sell to the Tabloids and say it is possessed by Elvis
  46. Use it with your Lego to make a computer
  47. Bang it on your bald head and instantly grow hair
  48. Use it as a murder weapon
  49. Make some adjustments and it is an EPROM programmer
  50. Give it to Ray Charles and tell him it is endless "Uh, huh"
  51. Use it to upgrade the warp drive on a constitutional class space vessel
  52. Attach some strings and use it as a sled
  53. Attach roll bars and it is a dune buggy
  54. Use it to keep your dog in place in the yard
  55. Threaten your little brother with it
  56. Get all of your friend's 300BPS modems and make a house out of them all
  57. Make it into a `Radio Flyer' by adding wheels and a pole
  58. Need a quick science project? Bring in your modem!
  59. Cut a hole and use it as a planter
  60. Strap it onto your head and pretend that you are Cadet Stimpy
  61. Get a few lenses, some film, and make a movie camera
  62. Get a plug, and send some voltage through someone's modem
  63. You know how there are `pet rocks'? How about a `pet modem'?
  64. Throw it out
  65. Sell it to an idiot for $100 and buy yerself a faster modem
  66. Put it in the snow and use it as a depth meter
  67. Stick it on the wall and call it ART
  68. Use it as a stepping stool
  69. Put pepper in it and it could be a pepper shaker
  70. Cut a hole in it and use it as a cereal bowl
  71. Paint it red play bocce (yard game w/heavy balls)
  72. If you are Jewish you could strap it on and use it as Tefillin
  73. If you have a big dog, give it to him as a chew toy
  74. Cut a hole and put stuff in it
  75. Put it in the attic and one day, it may be worth MONEY!
  76. Make a Doll House out of it
  77. A window box to put flowers in
  78. Make it into a lantern
  79. Give it to the neighbors
  80. Use it as a subject for painting (still life)
  81. Make it into a tunnel for your slot cars
  82. Recycle it
  83. Put it by the door and call it "Matt"
  84. Throw it in the water and call it "Bob"
  85. Hang it by the door and call it "Bell"
  86. Use it as a booster chair
  87. Throw it in the lake
  88. Give it to the phone company
  89. Bury it
  90. Take it to Florida and sell it
  91. Shape it into a Wok
  92. Take it to an antique shop
  93. Paint it all kinds of colors
  94. Take it for a walk
  95. Put it on a hat and say "Well, what did you expect?"
  96. You know that a penny could kill from the top of the World Trade Centers? Great, THROW THE MODEM!
  97. Anything that you want to!